In order to start a journey of self care I needed to look at some hard stuff. First, I have had a number of years that had some really hard things happen and I retreated into myself, covid did not help that and it is time to start enjoying my life again (of course I more than enjoy family time but it has become harder to come by these days). The problem is in figuring out what enjoying life looks like for me.
I thought a couple of hobbies might be nice so I ordered an adult paint by numbers, a couple new books and some sprouting trays to start growing microgreens. I imagined a different look in my house and started to rearrange some furniture to feel more comfortable and clean out some things that were no longer needed. I knew my health needed to become a priority so cleaned out the cupboards and starting looking at how I could accomplish this without diets and fads. I contacted a few friends and made plans to get together for a drink or dinner (hence the adulting I previously alluded to).
Last night I met with a wonderful friend who helped me to put some of these choices into perspective. Even though I was working on a couple of things, they did not feel very productive. . .obviously I was failing . . or was I??
Change takes time. I need to allow myself time to have these little steps form into habits and not be so hard on myself. I had decided I needed 5 changes but my loving and wise friend made me see that I was being too literal and in jeopardy of overwhelming myself, causing an adverse response to all I needed to do. She helped me understand that for right now I am in the progress of making changes and need to allow myself time to become used to them. I need to fill my tank before taking on anything else.
1) Physical Health: I am spending the time learning to eat differently, move more and try to find ways of healing some of my aches and pains
2) Spiritual Health: I have been in a dessert place for a long time and it has not done my any favours, I was happiest when my faith played a bigger role in day to day living so I have committed to going back to church and seeing what God might want to do with me now
3) Environment: Clearing some clutter and making my home more a place of refuge and peace (rather than a bed and kitchen) has already improved my day to day attitude. I have a few more corners and some painting to complete the transformation but so far I am pleased.
There are a few other things that I would like to work on but for the summer I shall focus on the above and take care of me for a change...I simply can no longer run on empty and will try to fill myself up over the next 6 weeks. Who knows what will happen after that :)
