Sorrel, dandelion, arugula, radicchio, endive, mustard greens. . . these are just a few of the bitter greens I love to cook with (yes, cooking for me is a grand adventure of experiencing new tastes and textures) however when I was doing some reading this week I came across another kind of bitter and quite frankly it made me very uncomfortable.When talking about food, bitterness is defined as a 'physical sense of taste' however if we are talking about people or their feelings it is defined as 'anger and disappointment at being treated unfairly; resentment'. Somehow in my mind this feels like a dark and often ugly emotion, one I do not want in my world at all. So why all the bitterness talk? The journey of Sarah and Hagar have shown up in a few places this week and a wise friend years ago told me if something comes up three times in a short span of time you should assume God is trying to tell you something (Thanks to Marilyn and her dad). With that in mind I wondered 'oh no, am I bitter!' There have been so many disappoints that have littered my life sometimes I feel as though God does not like me (yes I know better)...had those feelings and events turned me bitter?
From a biblical perspective, bitterness reared its ugly head way back in Genesis, Cain and Abel seemed to have started it (although there is probably an argument that the slimy snake was the first bitter creature), my reading was looking at Sarah and Hagar but I am sure that the historical instances are many. As I started to delve into the idea of bitterness I was surprised by the amount of information on the subject. First, bitterness does not just happen overnight, it starts off as a hurt and I have certainly had my fair share of that! Stephen Diamond, Ph.D. defines bitterness as "a chronic and pervasive state of smoldering resentment." That certainly made me stop, think and evaluate! Second, bitterness seems to only have one fool proof cure, forgiveness. . . sometimes easier said than done for sure but the choice is up to the individual. Thirdly, the cost of bitterness is a decline in your health, both mental and physical.
It is important to note that the thoughts I have listed greatly simplify the effects of bitterness! For me, examining my emotions in an effort to decide if bitterness fit was not enjoyable. I briefly visited some of the areas of my life that had been affected by the sorrow of betrayal, lost dreams, difficult times and realized that I probably still have some serious lamenting to do. That said, I was grateful to feel that despite the hardships I faced, I had not fallen into a perpetual state of bitterness.
